"What part of 'I got pissed on' don't you understand?"

Based on true events, but names have been changed to respect anonymity.

Pete and Juan go to the bathroom during lunch. They use adjacent urinals, cause, hey, they're buddies, and buddies can pee in close proximity to one another without it being gay. As they're peeing, another boy leaves the bathroom and turns off the lights on his way out. This surprises Pete, who then turns to face the light switch, and in the act of turning pees down Juan's leg.

"Dude! Ah! What the f#$%! You just pissed on my f#%cking leg!" Juan yells as Pete laughs in disbelief.

"Shit! What am I going to do? You just pissed on my leg dude. Oh god. That's disgusting! People are going to see! I'm going to kick your ass you f*@cking asshole!"

Pete laughs some more. "That's so gross. You gotta wash that out man, or it's going to stink!"

"F#%k you! You're such a piece of shit. I can't believe you f*#cking pissed one me. Jesus!"

"Sorry dude, it was an accident. Really."

"How is that an accident? You turned and pissed on my jeans! I got f#$cking pissed on! You're an asshole!"

Pete then gets a paper towl, wets it, then washes his jeans. At this point in time, it has come to the attention of the vice principals and security officers that something is up in the bathroom. As Pete and Juan walk out of the bathroom they are stopped by a group of school officials and the eyes of the 500 other students eating lunch.

Like wildfire, the story has spread trhoughout the commons that Juan peed on Pete in the bathroom. Between the principals, security officers, and the 500 other students, there are a total of 510 eyes looking over Pete. Sure enough, as he turns to discuss the event with the principals, a large wet spot on Pete's leg becomes visible. Chaos ensues and Juan is rushed to the office while Pete explains what exactly happened.

Pete walks back to Mr. Blue's class and waits for him to arrive. A dozen or so classmates join him outside the door while he explains what happened again. Mr. Blue soon arrives and notices a congregation growing in front of his door, Pete at its heart.

"What's up? How was lunch, guys?" Mr. Blue asks, looking towards the obviously distraught Pete.

"Shitty!"

"Whoa, watch the language there. What happened? Why was it bad?" The rest of the kids giggle and snigger under their breaths.

"I got pissed on."

"What?"

"I got pissed on. A guy pissed on my leg!"

"What? Are you kidding. No really, seriously."

"What part of 'I got pissed on' don't you understand?" Mr. Blue laughs incredulously and stares in disbelief.

Pause.

"Well, did you wash it off?"

"Yeah, of course!"

"With soap?"

"No." Mr. Blue laughs some more, then suggests that Pete go wash it down with some soap.

A few minutes later Pete rejoins the class. Mr. Blue finally settles down the class and manages to get them to move on to the subject at hand: Lord of the Flies. As the read together, the story's antagonist throws a piece of meat at another boy and tells him to eat it or else...

"Or else I'll piss on your leg" The boy seated next to Pete yells. The class erupts; Mr. Blue even breaks and laughs a bit. He corrals them again and moves on. As he continues reading, the image of Pete getting peed on continually flashes across his mind. With each sentence his grin grows wider until, by the end of the paragraph, he begins laughing. He blames it on another teacher's story from lunch. This process continues for four long pages. All the while Pete sits, staring into the windows across from him. By the end of the period, he has his face on the desk and his book lies on the floor.

The bell rings and the students leave. Pete leaves, dry.

Based on actual events.